Wednesday, 27 January 2010
How do you feel about 40?
Do you realise that you are going to be 40 in April?
Yes, that is what the diary says.
Does it bother you?
Not really, you are as old as the man you feel.
Well that makes you 50!
Okay, back track. I still feel as if I am embarking on adult life, but what I see in the mirror does indicate that I may be ageing. Make-up has become good manners rather than creative expression and the last time I visited a University I was shocked that they were letting in kids rather than contemporaries.
Do you mind being 40?
They say age is just a number, but being 40 has come as a bit of surprise.
By 40 weren't you meant to have achieved life's goals?
I remember saying to my first boss that I wanted to own a flat in London and a palace in Venice while running a large business.
Exactly what have you achieved?
I have a tumble down cottage that one day may be comfortable, I am setting up a business that has yet to break even and I can almost afford a holiday every other year. But, I am happy!
Er, happiness was not on your original wish list. Do you have any concerns?
Of course, I have concerns. I would love Sarita to have a brother or a sister but I am having a few miscarriage issues. Also I would love my business to be a huge success as I fundamentally believe in it.
Are you worried about failing on either of these counts?
Failure is quite an emotive word, besides both are a work in progress. I need a bit of TLC on the medical front, as I am fed up of feeling like shit, and some better time management skills on the business front; they are not critical factors in my happiness.
So how are you really feeling about turning 40?
Surprised that it has come around so quickly, but I think that with age I must be working out what really matters. This morning Sarita clambered into bed just a few minutes ahead of our alarm and we had a gentle family cuddle - that is worth more than a Palace in Venice to me! Let's start organising the party!