As a reader of Dawn's excellent blog The Moiderer I was interested to read about her new book. The description starts "One day, when my daughter was around 3 years old, she started asking "Are you happy mummy?".
Am I happy now? For the first time in years I can say 'yes'. There has been no seismic shift, just another a combination of good fun, appreciating the ups and working at it. It is no secret that I was terrified of getting post natal depression again, fear that again - when all else seemed to be going so well - I would find myself quietly crying as I pushed the buggy along.
Last time the depression crept up on me but now the has veil had lifted and I can feel things, and that feels good! Sure I get tired, at times I find the treadmill of nappy changing a little dull - but that is eclipsed by the good.
It is funny how sometimes an insignificant moment can shine a light on your life. I remember the moment when, eleven years ago getting out of the bath, I new with certainty I could spend the rest of my life with the Hubster. Similarly, the other day I was carrying DB back to our living room and I caught myself laughing as we chatted wordlessly. Yes, I had just changed a nappy; no, nothing dramatic was happening that moment - but my paradigm had changed and that was momentous - I was happy!
I was inspired to write this by Mich at Mummy from the Heart and her Reasons to Be Cheerful blog hop. As I have been blogging for a while I should be more clued up, but it took Mama Owl's prompt to get me up to speed on blog hop netiquette - I hope I have it sorted now. Anywhere here is the linky to help you finds other lovely entries. Thanks again to Mummy from the Heart and Mama Owl!