Tuesday, 23 October 2012

A Blossoming communicator

Twitter is a wonderful thing, it brings you into contact with all kinds of ideas and information. One month to go and I came across @VivienSabel and The Blossom Method. This is the storey of what happened next.

Vivien was already an expert in non-verbal communication as her mother was deaf, so it seemed natural to chatter to daughter Blossom before she could use words. The Blossom Method was her story, and she shares the lessons so that we could learn too.

With Pickle I was a standard first time Mum, stumbling around, reading all books (mainly as someone told me that I was too much of a hippy to do so) but feeling certain that my child was in individual not prefabricated schedule fodder. I was uncertain of her needs so my answer to most things was to feed her. She spent her first six months happy every day until indigestion set in as she should have been ready for bed.

This time I had no time for books, but Vivien had very kindly sent me a taster of what the Blossom Method could offer, and armed with this and a few chats I ready to give it a try.

First off I was stunned how easily it came to us. It was as if it just unlocked the door to communication. The first few days in hospital were a bit traumatised, and I was not overjoyed at having to have another blimin caesarean so at least I had something to restore my enthusiasm for motherhood.

Soon DB was telling me everything I wanted to know. With a baby there are three many issues: food, nappies and sleep. For food he licked his lips, for sleep his eyes darkened and the nappies - well it was absense of the other two indicators if I did not smell it first. Pretty soon he set himself into his own ideal routine: sleeping until 11 when I went to bed, then waking me once at 4pm - then often I awoke to the sound of him licking his lips not his cries and my throbbing breasts, I could be sat up phone in hand by before he let out his first yells of hunger.

Why the phone? I monitored his schedule out of interest initially and the #3amfc (twitter 3am feed club) was the most amazing source of good humour and mutual support.

Let me be honest, the blossom method is only as good as the amount of effort you put in. We were fairly crap. I am sure that if DB was a first child we we have put in exponential effort - but after the early promise we let it slip. Somehow the early interest must have paid off subliminally - as aged 14 months we are still being surprised by the benefits.

The way that he expects to be understood. From about six months he has burbled and gesticulated and fixed me has gaze while he expects to be understood. Hs eyes just yell, 'for goodness sake, Mum, get it right'.

He had also taken to sign language with total ease. We started with a few basics to help communications such as 'more' and 'all done'. I suddenly remembered that Pickle's first sign at around a year was 'please'. With a gulp I anticipated the weeks of repetition to help him learn his first step towards manners, but blow me down with a kiss, after showing him the sign once he had learnt it.

He is so easy going and knows just how to communicate his needs. I am certain this comes down to been always accustomed to being listened to and seeing that he could make himself understood.

Much of the book is not really rocket science, it is simple stuff - but it works. That is the joy of it, it is ground breaking stuff made simple by a genius.

Was this sponsored? Vivien did send me info and followed up with the book - I was asked to give early feed back, some of which appears I'm the book but other than that I have not been asked to review if, I chose to do so as I am converted :)

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